gabewave
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Caution Sense of Humor Needed Before Reading...
:o
Axis of Evil Wannabees
by John Cleese
Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil" club, Libya, China and Syria today announced that they had formed the "Axis of Just as
Evil", which they said would be more evil than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of in his State of the Union address. Axis
of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new Axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right! They are just as evil . . . in their
dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils . . . best at being evil . . . we're the best."
Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the original Axis of Evil.
"They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. "An axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam
Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the old evil Axis. So, you can only have three,
and a secret handshake. Ours is wickedly cool."
International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered. Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed
to gain triumvirate status in what has become a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan and Serbia announced that they had formed the "Axis of
Somewhat Evil," forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the "Axis of Occasionally Evil," while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established
the "Axis of Not So Much Evil Really as Just Generally Disagreeable."
With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the "Axis of
Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics". Canada, Mexico and Australia formed the "Axis of Nations That Are
Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Some Nasty Thoughts About America", while Scotland, New Zealand and Spain established the "Axis of Countries
That Want Sheep to Wear Lipstick." "That's not a threat, really, just something we like to do," said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.
While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axes, although he
rejected the establishment of the "Axis of Countries Whose Names End in 'Guay'", accusing one of its members of filing a false application. Officials
from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.
Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.
:flame:
Now Just Breath.
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the wizard
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hahhaha that was fickin funny gabe!! thanks man 
when kids ask me how does santa clause live forever, i tell them "it's because he drinks blood".
if life deals you lemons, why not go kill someone with the lemons(maybe by shoving them down his throat).
it's too bad that whole families have to be torn apart by something as simple as wild dogs.
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romi
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Thank you for posting this. It's very funny
I adore John Cleese. Did you saw "Erik, the Vikking"? It's one of my favourites movies. For me, John Cleese and his pals ("Monthy Python")
are the best.
I love to laugh, so if you have more of this, pleaseeeeeeee post it. :D Thank you.
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gabewave
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This was actually something I found on the Ministry Website. Al Jourgensen posted it on there himself to share with everyone. I thought it was very
funny and worth reading.
here is the link for the site
Enjoy.
Ministry Rules!:flame:
http://www.darkspoon.com/
[Edited on 3-13-2003 by gabewave]
Now Just Breath.
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