the wizard
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Registered: 10-16-2002
Location: washington d.c/ my bedroom
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why did the chicken cross the road?
GEORGE W. BUSH
> We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
> We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road
> or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us.
> There is no middle ground here.
>
> AL GORE
> I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the
> chicken crossing the road represented the application of
> these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented
> way designed to bring greater services to the American people.
>
> COLIN POWELL
> Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite
> image of the chicken crossing the road.
>
> HANZ BLIX
> We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet
> been allowed access to the other side of the road.
>
> MOHAMMED ALDOURI (Iraq ambassador)
> The chicken did not cross the road.
> This is a complete fabrication.
> We don't even have a chicken.
>
> SADDAM HUSSEIN
> This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified
> in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it
>
> RALPH NADER
> The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been
> polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach
> the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
> crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
>
> PAT BUCHANAN
> To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
>
> RUSH LIMBAUGH
> I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was
> getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone
> out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with
> crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much
> more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road
> paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking
> about your money, money the government took from you to build
> roads for chickens to cross.
>
> MARTHA STEWART
> No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going.
> I had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs
> when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me
> any insider information.
>
> JERRY FALWELL
> Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious?
> Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face?
> The chicken was going to the "other side."
> That's what they call it -- the other side. Yes, my friends,
> that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you
> will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we
> sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with
> seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side."
>
> DR. SEUSS
> Did the chicken cross the road?
> Did he cross it with a toad?
> Yes, The chicken crossed the road,
> But why it crossed, I've not been told!
>
> ERNEST HEMINGWAY
> To die. In the rain. Alone.
>
> MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
> I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
> without having their motives called into question.
>
> GRANDPA
> In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
> Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and
> that was good enough for us.
>
> BARBARA WALTERS
> Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the
> chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it
> experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish
> its life-long dream of crossing the road.
>
> JOHN LENNON
> Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
>
> ARISTOTLE
> It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
>
> KARL MARX
> It was an historical inevitability.
>
> VOLTAIRE
> I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I
> will defend to the death its right to do it.
>
> CAPTAIN KIRK
> To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
>
> FOX MULDER
> You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many
> more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
>
> SIGMUND FREUD
> The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed
> the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
>
> BILL GATES
> I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but
> will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook-
> and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
>
> ALBERT EINSTEIN
> Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath
> the chicken?
>
> BILL CLINTON
> I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.
> What do you mean by chicken?
> Could you define chicken, please?
>
> COLONEL SANDERS
> I missed one
when kids ask me how does santa clause live forever, i tell them "it's because he drinks blood".
if life deals you lemons, why not go kill someone with the lemons(maybe by shoving them down his throat).
it's too bad that whole families have to be torn apart by something as simple as wild dogs.
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Sidewinder 42
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Registered: 2-26-2003
Location: Adelaide, Australia
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http://www.chickenjoke.com
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iana
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Location: New York City
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That was funny as hell
There's plenty of room for all of God's creatures.Right next to the mashed potatoes!
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romi
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Registered: 2-19-2003
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It was very funny. I laugh a lot. Where did you get that???
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romi
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Registered: 2-19-2003
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| Quote: | Originally posted by romi
Where did you get that??? |
Never mind. It is on the link that Sidewinder42 gave. Do you know more links like that??? I love to laugh.
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Sidewinder 42
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Posts: 162
Registered: 2-26-2003
Location: Adelaide, Australia
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Mood: Suicidal
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| Quote: | Originally posted by romi
| Quote: | Originally posted by romi
Where did you get that??? |
Never mind. It is on the link that Sidewinder42 gave. Do you know more links like that??? I love to laugh. |
http://www.bored.com
then click on the jokes link on the left
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Lizard Johnny
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Registered: 10-15-2002
Location: Austria
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LOL
funny!
Burnin' down the night, set the world aliiiiiiiiight YEAH!
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Homer
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Registered: 3-1-2003
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... said chicken probably crossed the road to get away from Flush Limbaugh's rock bottom, bottom of the barrel show and that song by The Pretenders
that he's been playing every hour on the hour for over 15 years now ... over and over and over ...  :D   :o:P8):angel::moon::idea::puzzled::flame:
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